Always in my heart

If you've read any of this blog, you know I am a believer in signs. I never know exactly where they come from (God, the universe, mother nature), but I enjoy them and they are comforting to me. 

A few days after Amber's death I realized I needed to get out of the house. The thing about grief I've found is that you just want to curl up in a ball to cry and sleep and if anyone would tell me to snap out of that, it was Amber. So I got up, got dressed and headed to wander some of our favorite second hand stores. We had several stores in Florence and Nashville that we always explored when we were together. These stores don't have "new" items so you never know what you might find, and that is why we loved them so.

I walked in the door and the first thing I saw was a rack of Christmas ornaments and the first one was this:




Of course I burst into tears and went back home. After a few days I went back and the ornament was still hanging there waiting for me, so I came home and put up a tree to remind me that Amber is with me this Christmas. The thing is, she will always be with me, because she's in my heart and that is where I will hold her close for all of my days. I know I will cry when I think of how much I will miss her, but I will also laugh when something triggers a wonderful memory and I am so thankful I have plenty of those to treasure. 


Comments

sealyon said…
Well this just gave me a nice, poignant moment. I have come across signs like this before too. Like we shared with each other, she loved honeysuckle. We all know how the sense of smell is deeply embedded in the brain and can trigger memories profoundly. One day I went to mom's grave and there was a HUGE bush of them behind the headstone. I grabbed a handful, took a big wiff and wept then left them on the stone. These moments, the "signs", these little drop-ins to say hello are so precious. Thank you for sharing. Love you.
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